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What is the purpose of my second life?

A lot knew about my story but for today’s celebration of the Resurrection of Jesus, I want to take myself back to the time when my life absolutely turned topsy-turvy and what really transpired in between that day and today.

Seven years ago, I encountered a fatal accident and were it not for the people who cared enough to rush me to the hospital despite of the fact that I was lying at the highway unconscious, I would not have lived. Accordingly, my head CT scan result revealed an internal hemorrhage and a skull fracture that prompted an urgent surgery. Lo and behold, I survived.

I could remember vividly when I woke up inside a white room and my first complaint was “I am hungry.” I was still unaware of everything that had happened till my brother explained to me on how I survived the accident and was at the moment in the ICU as a post-op patient. Initially, nothing sank into my senses.

Days turned to weeks, when I was already in the private room and both of my catheter and NGT were removed and I was ready for ambulation, my mother brought a barber and I agreed to become bald. The first time I saw myself in the mirror inside the comfort room, when a reflection of a “skinny girl with bald and C-shaped-stitches at the right side of her head” flashed back to me, that was the time when everything pierced my heart and torn it apart. I drowned mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

The aftermath of the fatal accident brought not life to me but failure. Not only did I lose my identity; I was a living failure.

I was hungry…hungry for a purpose. Nothing ever satisfied!

Then I was back to school after one semester of recovery, in one ordinary afternoon, somebody invited me for a bible study. The question that was thrown to me was “If you’re going to die today, where do you think will you go?” I answered with all simplicity and honesty, “It depends where I will be accepted.”

From that first bible study, I found myself having no absence week by week. It was like the void in my heart was slowly being filled.

I said “Yes” in knowing Jesus through the Bible but I was not sold-out at all. I had my own set of fears and doubts. I was afraid of being taken outside of my comfort. In reality, I had a lot of detours. I had a lot of “Nos” to Him. I refused. I denied. I even rejected. He was not my priority. He was not my first love. It was like He’s my last option when circumstances would fail me. The partiality of my "Yes," He accepted. 

Year after year, little did I expect, my baby steps turned to brave steps. From brave steps to bold steps and from bold steps to leap of faith. And now, dancing in faith! He pursued without ceasing. He did not insist. He waited till I surrendered my life to Him.

Yes, I found my purpose at the Cross. I found my life in the Person who first gave His! Jesus is my Resurrection. Jesus is my Life.



Me and my Neurosurgeon


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